Tag Archives: finances

Basic Principles, Faith and Finances

Barns and tools

I recently had a discussion with a man who loves investing.  We talked about why he enjoys investing.  We also talked about the proper uses of wealth, and about the purpose of life.

That night I had a dream about a  man who loved high-quality tools. He spent many years building up a collection of professional-grade tools, more than he could ever use. He kept them in immaculate condition and loved to buy, sell and trade them.

This became a profitable business for him, and he became quite wealthy. Whereas once he had been interested in what he could do with a given tool, now he simply focussed on amassing a greater and greater collection of these valuable tools.  He was quite proud of how well he had done in this business. The tools he had obtained sat unused in his storage buildings. He never used them. He only bought and sold them.

One day this man died and stood before the Creator to give an account of his life. He expected to be commended for the diligence and skill he had shown in his business dealings. But to his dismay, the Creator asked him a simple question, one for which he had no answer.

My son, what did you do with the tools I entrusted to your care?

When I awoke I realized that my dream was a re-telling of a parable of Jesus found in Luke 12:16-21.

The ability to prosper comes from God ( Deuteronomy 8:17-18).  It is good to enjoy our ability to work and prosper. Wealth can be used to do good or evil.  If we use it to do good, we will be commended by God. However, Jesus warns us that wealth can become a snare for our soul (Matthew 6:19-21). If we focus on obtaining wealth for its own sake, we forget why we were created.

Wise people will set their hearts on God, and as God enables them to prosper, they will offer their prosperity to Him as a tool to do good.

 

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Dreams and Visions, Family Life, Vision

Home Sweet Home

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Twenty-one years ago I was in my mid forties and in the midst of a career change. I had been working as a pastor and church planter for over fifteen years and then had spent a year at business college. I was starting a new line of work in information technology while also attempting to plant a church. In May 1997 my family and I moved to a rural neighbourhood north of the village of Russell, south-east of Ottawa.

Ten years later, the ministry which was our original reason for moving to Russell had been destroyed, and Marion and I knew it was time to move on. Out of this painful ending, a new chapter was beginning.  We moved to Vanier, a historic neighbourhood in the heart of Ottawa.  The past eleven years have been full of blessing, with many new relationships and involvements, offering ample opportunity to enjoy God’s manifold goodness, serve others, and grow in love.

Still, despite the painful ending of our ministry in Russell, leaving was not easy for us. We had come to love the neighbourhood, the community life, and the family of God in the Russell area. Our four children had formed deep and strong connections there. Our three sons grew to adulthood during our Russell years, and our daughter grew from a little girl to a teenager. For her especially, Russell still feels like home.

Even so, Marion and I had never entertained any thoughts of moving back. Our life was in Ottawa now – or so we thought. When Bethany and Dunovan chose Russell United Church as the location for their wedding in 2015, I was glad to visit, but it very much felt like going back to a place we used to live. When Reuben and Jess bought a house in Russell in 2016, I was happy for them, but it didn’t really cause me to re-evaluate where Marion and I should be living. We had formed new networks, we were settled in new routines, we had become engaged in various productive and mostly satisfying pursuits.  We expected to stay in our little house in Vanier for the foreseeable future.

However, as I have learned many times by now, there is actually no such thing as the “foreseeable future”. Life is full of unexpected turns. When we think we have it all figured out, God has a chuckle at our expense.

And so it was, in the course of time, on a Sunday morning early in February, that our daughter had a dream, and told it to her mother.

Yesterday, Marion and I reached an agreement to purchase a house on Stanley Crescent, just around the corner from where we used to live. Today, Marion and I had photos taken to list our house in Vanier for sale. It will be on the market by Friday of this week, forty days after Bethany shared her dream with Marion.

Are we crazy? Maybe. But then, isn’t everyone who seeks to follow God’s leading a little crazy in the eyes of the world? I’d rather be a little crazy than live without vision.  Vision from God is like manna to my spirit and my soul. It gives fresh energy to these weary, ageing bones. And so, when Holy Spirit begins to show me fresh vision, I want to embrace what He is showing me, even if it disrupts my comfortable, settled routines.

I don’t know all the reasons for this move, but I do know that the Spirit has been speaking to me about a new season, with new priorities. I want to pursue those new priorities with all my heart. To me, that’s the only way to live. He’s also been speaking to me about redemption, restoration, and completion of things that had been abandoned and left unfinished – not so much in institutional ministry as in relationships. After all, it is relationships that are intended by God to be eternal. When all else fails, love remains.

New vision? New beginnings? Bring it on!

 

 

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Brokenness and Wholeness, Community, Faith and Finances, Social Commentary

Coldest Night of the Year

I remember when I first heard about Jericho Road Ministries from its founder, my friend Ray Desmarais. A compassionate man with a big heart for the hurting and homeless, Ray wanted to do something practical to help. Over the years, his relentless drive and passion led to the birthing of a ministry that has demonstrated the love of Jesus to hundreds of broken people in Ottawa’s core. While appreciating the need for shelters such as Shepherds of Good Hope and the Ottawa Mission, Jericho Road has chosen to offer smaller-scale, discipleship-based group homes with the aim of helping mentally ill or addicted men and women get off the street and learn practical life skills in an atmosphere of structured Christian community.

For several years my wife Marion and I were among the regular performers at a weekly coffee house offered by Jericho Road. We loved it! At the time, we lived in the rural community of Russell, and the coffee house gave us an opportunity to serve and rub shoulders with people that we wouldn’t normally have any contact with. Now that we live in the historic neighbourhood of Vanier, so close to downtown, I have a whole new appreciation for the work done by ministries such as Jericho Road.

I no longer sing at the Jericho Road coffee house, as there are now plenty of musicians to fill the roster, but on February 20, I’ll be joining a team led by Jericho Road director Hope Versluis in a walk in support of this great ministry, along with dozens of other Ottawans. The event is known as The Coldest Night of the Year, and takes place in cities across the nation in support of various charities that serve the hurting and homeless. In Ottawa, your donations will go to support Jericho Road. I’d be grateful if you would consider supporting me with a donation.

If you would like to donate, or would consider joining the walk yourself, you can do so by going to my personal home page. All donations are tax-deductible.

God bless you.

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Faith and Finances, House of Prayer, Intimacy with God, Neighbourhood, Reflections on Life, Seasonal Thoughts

New Years Resolutions

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I am not a big fan of New Years Resolutions. I haven’t made one in several years, that I can recall.

It’s not that I don’t like making commitments. It’s just that I prefer to let the Lord lead me into new seasons in his timing, and in my life, those new seasons don’t always correspond with the beginning of a new calendar year.

This year, however, many things are changing as the new year begins. I am re-entering the world of Information Technology contract consulting after a nine-month hiatus. Marion and I are also at the beginning of a new venture in our neighbourhood, as we take our first tentative steps towards the development of a community House of Prayer in the heart of Vanier. In addition, I have taken on a role as a worship leader on a once per month basis in a small church that is being planted here in Vanier.

Marion and I have always been good with money and we have never had problems limiting our expenses, but for the past few years we have had a fair bit of discretionary income.  The new consulting contract, while a blessing, does not pay as well as the ones I have had for the past several years, with the result that our discretionary income will be somewhat reduced. And so, for the first time in several years, I have made a budget.

Along a similar vein, as I have considered the new ministry involvements that are starting up shortly, I have realized that they will require me to be more intentional about my use of time. So, for the first time in several years, I have found it necessary to create a weekly timetable, allocating specific chunks of my days and weeks to Bible study, prayer, worship, exercise, work, rest and recreation.

This may not seem particularly noteworthy or exciting. In fact, to some of you it may sound downright boring. But as I was considering all this, I realized that there is something else going on which is more profound. During the closing days of 2012, Marion and I followed several of the sessions of the year-end OneThing conference at International House of Prayer. For me, a key insight came as I listened to Misty Edwards speak about what it means to bear the easy yoke of Jesus. She made the simple observation that although it may be an easy yoke, it is a yoke nonetheless, and a yoke is a form of discipline. To bear a yoke means that I do not belong to myself. I am the bondservant of the One who gave his life for me.

As I listened to her words, I realized that the Lord was calling me to a more disciplined, more focussed life. For the past several years, although I have not stopped praying, giving, worshipping or serving, I have in a sense been waiting for a new assignment from the Lord. I had been thinking of this assignment largely in terms of an identifiable ministry role. During the OneThing conference, the Lord made it clear what my assignment is. Until He returns, my assignment is to love Jesus with all my heart, soul, mind and strength, and to live my life for his pleasure.

I already knew this, of course; the Spirit has been working this understanding into me for many years. Yet somehow, the pieces fell into place more clearly and decisively as I listened to Misty Edwards a couple of days ago. Maybe her words had such impact because for the past thirteen years, she has given her life as an intercessory missionary, serving in a place of relative obscurity.

Whatever the reason, I now know in a way I did not know before that I have only one assignment. It is to live for his pleasure, to live before His eyes. There will be other secondary assignments, of course, flowing from that primary one. But the secondary assignments should never become my identity, should never be allowed to take over the primary place in my heart. All that matters is loving Jesus and living for his smile. For me, the budgeting of time and money is an expression of what that assignment currently requires.

As I was finishing this post, I received a phone call with the news that a friend from our church had died suddenly while on vacation with his wife. He was in his middle years, and full of vitality.

Such news is always sobering. Whenever someone dies, it reminds me that my life is not my own, and I can’t put off serving the Lord until tomorrow. It seems like yesterday that I turned fifty, and yet my sixtieth birthday is only a few months off. I want to live the years that remain to me with my eyes locked in on Jesus. And by God’s grace, that is what I will do.

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Movies, Reflections on Life

An Unexpected Journey

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Yesterday evening Marion and I watched The Hobbit : An Unexpected Journey, based on the first part of Tolkien’s 1937 fantasy classic The Hobbit. This was my first experience watching a movie in 3D, and I found The Hobbit impressive in every respect. As someone who doesn’t go to a lot of movies, I was struck by how cinematographic technology has made it possible to create an alternate reality so powerful that it completely overwhelms your senses.

Yet for me, no matter how technically impressive it may be, a movie is only truly satisfying if it says something important. The Hobbit satisfies on that count too. This morning, while lying half-awake in bed, images and thoughts from The Hobbit were chasing themselves through my head. I sensed a blog post coming on, so I asked the Lord for clarity, and gradually found myself mulling over two significant and inter-related themes. Others may find other messages in this story, but for me these are the ones that stood out.

First there is the character of Bilbo Baggins himself. He’s an unlikely hero who doesn’t really want any part of the quest to recapture the dwarves’  lost kingdom, around which the story is built. But Gandalf the wizard chooses him intentionally, believing that Bilbo has a crucial role to play. Gandalf sees something in Bilbo that the others on the expedition – including Bilbo himself – seem to have overlooked. The legendary dwarvish warrior Thorin Oakenshield, leader of the expedition, despises Bilbo at first, and writes him off as a no-account who should have stayed home. Yet in the end the surprising Bilbo finds a reserve of courage within himself and saves Thorin’s life in a key battle.

Another significant though understated motif is the destructive effect of the dwarves’ lust for gold and gems. Smaug, the dragon who stole the dwarves’ wealth and their homeland, is an undeniably nasty character. Still, it was the unbridled greed and covetousness of Thorin’s grandfather that attracted Smaug’s attention in the first place, and thus ironically led to the downfall of the dwarves’  kingdom. Ever since, the dwarves have nursed hatred and resentment over their lost riches. Their quest to recover their lost kingdom is fuelled by more than just a desire to return to their homeland. It’s not just their homes that they regret losing, but their treasure troves of gold and jewels.

There is a subtle irony here. In the overarching delineation of good vs. evil that characterizes almost all fantasy literature, the dwarves are clearly among the good guys. They are basically positive characters. Yet their lust for ever more and greater wealth, like some sort of inner cancer gnawing at their hearts, has tainted them with an enduring bitterness over the loss of their mountain of gold. This bitterness has skewed their perspective until they mistrust anyone but themselves, and see even their potential allies – the Elves – as objects of suspicion. Obsessed with their lost wealth, they are so consumed with rage that they are in danger of becoming almost the mirror image of their hated enemy Smaug.

And then there is the Precious. In one of the many misadventures that characterize Tolkien’s tale, Bilbo stumbles upon Gollum, anti-hero of the Lord of the Rings trilogy. Gollum has somehow found the One Ring of Power, an occult object that later turns out to be the key to a new attempt at world domination by the forces of darkness. The ring has taken possession of Gollum’s soul and transformed him into a despicable yet pitiful character. He is obsessed with the ring and calls it his Precious. Bilbo finds the ring, not realizing its significance. The ring helps him escape, but those who know the plot line of Lord of the Rings will remember that years later, Bilbo’s nephew Frodo would need to sacrifice the ring of power to save the world. So the theme of the One Ring, though largely undeveloped in this first installment of The Hobbit series, could be seen as a sub-theme of the “greed and lust for power” motif.

For those who are still with me, I want to shift gears now and talk a bit about why these themes stood out for me.

Jesus has been reminding me these last few months about the things that have true and enduring value. On one occasion Jesus compared the Kingdom of God to buried treasure. This treasure is so valuable, said Jesus, that if you find it, you should sell everything you own to buy it. He also compared the Kingdom of God to a merchant in search of fine pearls who found a single pearl of such great worth that he sold everything he had to buy this one pearl. As well, he said that the way to true life is narrow and few find it, while the road to destruction is broad and many take it.

The pearl of great price and the buried treasure are one and the same. The pearl is Jesus himself, the crucified one who bore our sins and who is coming to reign. He is the rightful king of our lives and of the whole universe. Jesus was king even while he was dying for our sins, and he is still king now while seated at his Father’s right hand in the heavens, but at present Jesus is king in a hidden way. Most people don’t realize that Jesus is the rightful king of the whole earth. Right now it looks to most people as though little or nothing is under Jesus’ control. That’s because Jesus is above all a merciful king. In his mercy and his patience he has chosen to delay the inevitable Day of Reckoning. He is waiting to see who will come to repentance – who will put their trust and their hope in Him. He is waiting for his enemies to be made his footstool. But Jesus has promised that one day the waiting will be over. Soon He will return in power and glory to rule the earth openly and restore all things.

God’s Kingdom is much more valuable than gold or jewels or power or any of the other things people chase in this world, but most people are blind to what is really worth investing their lives in. That’s why most people take the broad and easy road that leads to destruction. Even if they’re not consumed with greed like Smaug, most people want to live their own life their own way. They don’t really want to live life Jesus’ way, because that means giving up control, laying down their right to call the shots, run their own careers, set their own course, choose their own path. Jesus’  invitation is open to anyone – anyone may come on this journey – but it means surrendering our pride, our independence and what we think of as our security. Most people don’t want to do that. Yet ironically, the only truly secure place to be is with Jesus.

Jesus isn’t the only treasure in God’s kingdom. Another way to think of the parables of the Pearl and the Hidden Treasure is that Jesus is the one searching for treasure and looking for fine pearls. Every time he finds someone whose heart is hungry for reality, He says “That one’s mine! That’s my treasure, the one I gave my life for”. And so Jesus, the Pearl of Great Price, is himself on a treasure hunt. The treasure he seeks consists of all those who will put their hope in him – the unlikely heroes, like Bilbo, who aren’t impressed with themselves but are impressed with Jesus and are willing to walk with him through the adventures of life, no matter where he leads. They are willing to do this because He has promised them a homeland, an eternal city that is coming to earth.

All of this may sound horribly old-fashioned, but it’s as true today as when Jesus and the apostles first spoke these things. If we get sidetracked by the lust for wealth, power, control and security, then like the dwarves, we will become embittered and unfruitful as our hearts get burdened down with cares that we were never meant to carry. But when we surrender our independence, invest our hearts in Jesus and decide to follow where He leads, then like Bilbo we are transformed little by little until to our own surprise we become heroes in God’s army.

An unexpected journey? Not a bad name for the walk of a disciple of Jesus. It’s a journey down a road that not everyone wants to walk, but a journey that is more than worth the cost. All that we surrender – all that we have to lose – is our independence, our pride, our so-called security, and all the illusions that we have about ourselves. But Jesus has no illusions about us. He knows our potential. He knows what needs to die in us so that we can embrace this journey, and what we can become as we walk with Him. Down this road lies true treasure – not the fleeting pleasure of worldly wealth and power that will fade and vanish like a mist, but the lasting satisfaction of a love relationship with the One who made the universe, the promise that He will always provide for us and lead us, and the sure knowledge that one day He will rule the whole earth, and we will reign with him. That’s the homeland we are looking for, that’s the king we are eager to serve, that’s the treasure that we seek, that’s the life that is worth living – the life that is truly life.

 

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House of Prayer

House of Prayer : Where do we go from here?

So where do we go from here? How do we move forward with this vision of a House of Prayer in the heart of Vanier?

As one of my friends and readers has pointed out to me, talk is cheap. It’s easy to have discussions in social media about concepts, We may even think we are engaging as we “like” someone’s blog or Facebook posts, or “follow” someone’s Twitter feeds. But this kind of engagement costs us almost nothing. Unless this talk translates into some form of concrete action, it means very little. While social media discussions may be useful in stimulating our thinking, the time spent on such discussions can also become a substitute for prayer and face-to-face encounter with God and with in-the-flesh brothers and sisters – the kind of encounter that actually changes us.

If you have been reading this blog, and are sensing that God may be nudging you about getting involved with an eventual House of Prayer in Vanier, here are some next steps that we might take together.

1 – Further exploration of vision – while building initial community
The first step has two parts. I would propose that we do both of them concurrently.

Part One- weekly meetings To begin building community among those who are drawn by the vision of a House of Prayer, I’d propose that we begin weekly prayer meetings in January 2013, with a monthly potluck meal. The meetings would certainly need to include prayer and worship, since this is at the core of what a House of Prayer is and does, but they would also need to include a component of discussion and sharing around vision, so that people have a chance to ask questions and give their input.

If you like this idea, and would like to participate, please let me know.

Part Two – ongoing dialogue To continue clarifying vision, I’d suggest that as well as using the weekly meetings as a platfom, we intentionally use social media (this blog, podcasts, an eventual Facebook page) to continue developing our shared understanding of what a House of Prayer in Vanier would look like. I very much want this to be a collaborative process. I recognize that the mantle of primary vision-carrier for a House of Prayer in Vanier rests with me, but I also recognize that within the broad parameters of vision that I have already laid out, many nuances are possible, and many of you will have contributions to make as we move forward to discern what it is that we are called to do together.

2 – Visits to other Houses of Prayer
As we are discerning vision, it will be very useful to visit other Houses of Prayer to see how they do things. Marion and I have made a list of Houses of Prayer that we would like to visit, and we intend to begin doing this on weekends in 2013 (making at most probably two such visits per month, probably more realistic to think in terms of one per month). Any of you who are interested in coming along on any of these visits would be more than welcome.

3 – Developing a team
As we go through the process of building community and clarifying vision, I am hoping that each of you who read this blog will be asking yourselves “What about me? Is this vision for me? Where do I fit in?”.

Our long-term goal is to develop a 24/7 House of Prayer. But that doesn’t mean that to be part of the team, you have to commit to praying 24/7!  Of course no-one can do that anyway. That’s why we need a team.

The launch point at which we can legitimately begin to call ourselves a House of Prayer is when we have at least one weekly prayer watch. This would also be a good litmus test for an “entry level” involvement in the House of Prayer. If you can commit to one weekly prayer watch, you can think of yourself as part of the House of Prayer team. Beyond that, different levels of involvement will be appropriate for different people.

So, if you find that God is grabbing your heart with the vision of a House of Prayer and you want to be part of it – your involvement is welcome. At this early stage, when things are very simple, small and fluid, all that’s required is an email or message letting me know that you’re on board. As we go down the road, we will probably come up with some sort of verbal covenant to which we will ask people to recommit on an annual basis. This will provide everyone with a checkpoint or gateway – it will function as both an “entry point” and an “exit point”.

We will probably aim to have an initial time of covenant making by September 2013. Up until then you can be involved without any long-term commitment. When we make our initial covenant, you will need to decide whether you are called to be a part of the House of Prayer. Of course, guests are always welcome, so if you’re not sure, it doesn’t mean you have to go away – but members of the family will have a voice and a share in the family’s decisions that guests do not yet have.

4 – Setting up governing structure
Eventually, a leadership and governing structure will need to be established. I hope to work towards an initial form of this in 2013.

Also, in a nation in which Christian groups still qualify as charities, and where tax incentives are available for those who give financial support to said charities, there are benefits to obtaining charitable status.  This is likewise a goal that I will pursue in 2013.

5 – Comments
As always, your comments and feedback are more than welcome. Please let me know what the Holy Spirit is speaking to you as you consider these things. If you leave your thoughts as a comment, others will be able to benefit as well.

Your brother,

Peter

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Eschatology, Faith and Finances, House of Prayer, Reflections on Life

Resident aliens

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When my son Simeon moved to the United States a few years ago, I was a bit surprised to learn that according to the United States Government, he was an alien. Even after getting his Green Card, which allows him to work in the USA, the correct term for his new status was not Permanent Resident or Landed Immigrant (terms that I was familiar with from Canada). According to Uncle Sam, even though Simeon has now lived and worked in the USA for several years, owns a house, has a bank account and pays taxes there, he is still an alien, and he will continue to be an alien until the day that he swears allegiance to the United States of America and becomes a United States citizen.

When we hear the word alien, for many of us the first thought that comes to mind may be of creatures from outer space.  But according to TheFreeDictionary.com, the word alien can also mean a person from another and very different family, people, or place. That’s an excellent description of what it is like to be a Christian in a hostile world. We are aliens. We belong to a different family, people and place than the children of the world. We have a different king, a different government, a different identity, a different value system and a different hope. Paul wrote that our citizenship is in heaven. We are citizens of a kingdom that will totally replace the current world system when Jesus returns to restore the earth and reign openly as king. In the meantime, we are strangers and aliens in the world system, living by the values of a kingdom that most people don’t see yet. One day the whole world will see this kingdom because it will be fully manifested on the earth. With the eyes of faith, friends of Jesus see it now, even though dimly, and we seek to live by its light.

The first Christians lived in a culture that was openly hostile to their faith, and some of them suffered greatly for it. The Apostle Peter was so aware of this that he wrote an entire letter to strengthen and encourage these embattled believers. He didn’t tell them to try hard to fit in and accommodate themselves to the culture they were in (which seems to be the strategy of much of the North American evangelical church these days). And significantly, he also didn’t tell them that their assignment was to take over the power structures and change the culture by force. The Zealots had tried that in Israel, and Jesus completely repudiated their approach, as Peter no doubt well remembered. Instead, Peter told them to be different, to live lives that were in stark contrast with the values of the world around them.

These were his words :

Dear friends, I urge you, as aliens and strangers in the world, to abstain from sinful desires, which war against your soul.

Basically, he was warning Christ followers not to adopt the standards, values, goals or desires of the people of this age, because this would dilute their witness and had the potential to destroy their relationship with him.

My personal circumstances have given me plenty of cause to think about these things in recent weeks. For fifteen years now, I have made my living as an IT sub-contractor. Some people think that consultants make a lot of money, but that’s not always the case. Marion and I home-schooled for most of those years, so my income was the only income for the family. As a fairly junior programmer, in my first few years my income was barely enough to meet our expenses. It was always enough, but there was never a lot extra. Gradually this began to change, and in the past few years our life became somewhat more comfortable. In an earlier phase of our life together, Marion and I had lived below the poverty line as church planters for years, and our personal tastes are quite simple, so we can quite easily be content on a limited income. However, I had been given a promise several years ago that the Lord intended to prosper us both financially and spiritually so that Marion and I could be a financial and spiritual blessing to many, and this had been repeated a couple of years ago by a prophetic minister who knew nothing of our circumstances, goals or visions, but told me that I would be a storehouse like Joseph.

With these promises in mind, when my last contract came to an end almost nine months ago, I was full of confidence in the Lord’s provision. Interruptions in work are commonplace for people in my line of work, but we had a financial buffer that was more than adequate for three months. My longest layoff ever had lasted three and a half months, so I was confident that I would soon have work again. Not only that, I had numerous indications that with my fifteen years of experience, my knowledge and skills were in demand and my prospects looked quite good. There were several possibilities on the horizon. I had been journalling and seeking the Lord, and had asked him whether He wanted me to continue in the IT field or step out into ministry on a faith basis. I sensed that He was saying I should expect to stay in the IT field for a few years longer. So, based on everything that I sensed God had been showing me, and the prophetic words I had received about being a storehouse, I confidently expected that my layoff from work would be brief, and that my new contract would be financially lucrative, providing additional seed for the storehouse that the Lord had spoken of. I even had sufficient confidence to turn down a couple of contracts in the early stages of what proved to be a nine-month waiting period, because I sensed that the Lord had assured me he had something better for me.

Since then I have gone after fifteen different contract opportunities, some of them very attractive, financially and in other ways. I was well qualified for many of them. I had so many near misses that I can no longer write them off as coincidences or “the luck of the draw” (not that I really believe in these concepts anyway : for one who belongs to Jesus, nothing happens purely by chance). The Word of God tells us that it is God who promotes one and brings down another. These matters are in his hands. I can only conclude that the Lord was making me wait for a reason.

Along the way, I did a lot of journalling, bike riding and prayer walking. I prayed alone and with Marion. I fasted. I worshipped. I wrote songs. I studied the Word and listened to many excellent Bible teachings which have had a profound impact on my relationship with God. I read through the Book of Psalms over and over again. I knew that God was doing something new in my life, preparing Marion and me for a new season. I found the extra time with God extremely beneficial, even though I found the waiting (without a defined end date in sight) to be a significant trial to my faith. In my times of seeking the Lord, I cried out to God; I argued with Him; I asked Him questions; I humbled myself and surrendered time and again. Many times I would ask him the same questions over and over again. “Have I been hearing you correctly? Is there anything I am missing? Is there anything else you want to say to me? When will the provision come?” And as I journalled and prayed, over and over again I received the Lord’s assurance that His provision would come at the right time, and that when it came, it would be just right.

In the end, I took a contract that was financially less lucrative than any of the other fifteen that I had pursued or been offered at one time or another over the past nine months. I am now going to be compensated at a level lower than I have been at for seven years. Some of my colleagues tell me they have not had a contract at these rates since the late 1990s. In fact, many of them would refuse to work for these rates, and some have implied that I should not take this contract because I am selling out. Yet, I have the Lord’s assurance that this is His blessing and provision for me. Along the way I have seen promises broken and colleagues blessed with positions that I can legitimately say I should have had. When I have prayed about this, the Lord has reminded me that these people don’t have the blessing of a relationship with Him, so I now have an opportunity to pray for them to see God’s goodness in their circumstances and turn to Him. I also will have the opportunity to work in an environment where I have worked before, with at least two people (a manager and a team leader) who are potentially open to the gospel but have not yet received the Lord. This too is an answer to prayer, but I can only be a blessing to them if my own heart is in a place of gratitude and contentment. So the Lord has given me an exquisitely designed test. No-one is able to design more elegant tests than the Holy Spirit.

Suffice it to say, this has been a time of humbling for me. I realize now, with the 20-20 vision that hindsight sometimes affords, that when the Lord told me the provision was going to be just right, he wasn’t primarily thinking of finances. Marion and I know how to budget, and the financial provision will be more than enough. It always is. And since finances are not my primary goal anyway, it really doesn’t matter. We’ll have less excess to give away – at least from employment income – but that’s up to God, not me. If He wants me to be a storehouse, he’s not limited to employment as a way of getting me there. Joseph didn’t get raised up to be the second most powerful man in Egypt through his own efforts. It was entirely through God’s grace and mercy. But he did have to go through a significant period of humbling, and he had to be faithful. In the end it was his faithfulness, integrity, and spiritual perceptiveness that drew the attention of the king.

This chain of events has served to remind me that as a Christ follower I live by a different value system than the world around me. I knew this of course, but when you work for years with the children of this world, it can affect you without you even realizing it. The nine-month layoff provided sufficient time for the gestation of a new ministry vision. It allowed me the opportunity to take my hands off some things that I had looked to for security, which the Lord told me to sell to provide for our needs while waiting for work. It provided a time for me to refocus and get my eyes onto Jesus again. I didn’t think I had taken my eyes off of him, but I have seen that I had become more dull and compromised than I had realized, and the Lord wanted to sharpen me, humble me, make me tremble again in His presence. There are things He wants me to do in the years to come, and to fulfil his purposes for the remainder of my earthly journey, I need to be a sharp instrument in His hands.

Like my son, who is a Canadian citizen living in the United States, people who belong to Jesus are citizens of a different kingdom. We are in a war with our own fallen nature, the world system and the Prince of Darkness, and that war will continue until the Lord Jesus returns to claim his Bride and rule the earth openly.

In the meantime His people look for his kingdom as from a distance, and live by its light in the shadows of a mostly dark world. That’s what it means to be a city on a hill. We are called to be different, not motivated by earthly power or the world’s approval but motivated by the smile of Jesus, the crucified one, our lover, our friend and our king, who is coming to reign.

The experiences of the past nine months have shown me again that I am an alien and a stranger in this age. I am looking for a heavenly kingdom that is coming to earth, and I belong to a king who is a passionate lover of my soul, and who will tolerate no rivals for my affections. A financial loss – which He is well able to replace – is a small price to pay to have my vision refocussed, my heart reawakened and my priorities clarified again. Thank you Jesus.

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Basic Principles, Eschatology, Faith and Finances, Intimacy with God, Reflections on Life

Why we wait

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Many of you know that my last IT consulting contract ended almost three months ago. Since then, Marion, Bethany and I have been living on reserves, and I have been waiting on the Lord for new work.

There have been several “near misses” in this process. There were a couple of contracts that I could have had, but turned down. Others, however, seemed attractive to me. I was confident that I could have done the work, and I wanted to win the bid, but it went to someone else. Since no circumstance in my life is outside of God’s control, and I have been actively and intentionally submitting this whole process to Him, I can only assume that the delay is part of God’s provision.

Let me be clear. My family and I have been in no real financial distress during this time. The wrestle for me has not been about managing finances, but about trusting God’s promises and fully co-operating with His purposes. A little over a year ago I received a major prophetic word while visiting International House of Prayer. Part of the word was that I would be like Joseph, a financial storehouse for others. So, my rational mind tells me that it is not helping me achieve this goal to see my reserves get eaten away by a three-month hiatus in work.  But sometimes God allows us to go through a season where our circumstances seem to contradict the word we have been given. This is not a bad thing. In fact, waiting for God’s promise is a necessary process. It’s part of how God builds faith. He is the one who will fulfil the word, and He will do it in His way. My part is to be a man of faith, to act on the word I have been given.

There are preachers and teachers who would like you to believe that faith means expecting all your hopes to be fulfilled in this life, in this age, without any delay. That may be what our human nature would like to believe, and it may be how Hollywood celebrities like to live their lives, but it’s not what the Bible teaches and it’s not true to the experience of God’s people, past or present.

Yes, it is true that when Jesus healed people, he didn’t make them wait. He healed them on the spot, no delay. But it’s also true that Jesus himself had to wait for his most important desires to be fulfilled (see Luke 12:49 for one example of this).  He knows what it is like to long for something that is coming, but is not here yet. Jesus longs for his wedding day – the great day when he returns to claim the earth as His own, wed his Bride, banish evil and establish his throne openly. But he is waiting for the Day appointed by his Father (Matthew 24:36).

The other day I saw a video clip produced by Voice of the Martyrs in Nigeria. That beautiful, fertile, potentially prosperous yet troubled land is increasingly being plagued by the scourge of militant Islam. Boko Haram, a jihadist group that has already killed hundreds of Christians in the northern part of Nigeria, is now threatening to start attacking the mostly-Christian south as well, using methods such as food poisoning. Their declared goal is to turn Nigeria into an Islamist state by killing all the Christians in Nigeria who refuse to convert to Islam (there are over 80 million Christians in Nigeria, about half the population of the country).

The video clip showed numerous heart-wrenching examples of the suffering of Christians in the areas where Boko Haram’s campaign of terror has already been unleashed. But it also showed signs of hope. VOM has been standing with the church in Nigeria, providing help to displaced persons and the families of martyrs so that they can rebuild their lives. I was struck by the determination of Christian leaders in Nigeria not to give in to intimidation. One of the leaders interviewed on the video clip declared that the reason for the campaign of terror is that Christianity has been growing through evangelism in the mostly-Muslim north, and Muslim leaders are afraid of losing control, so they resort to fear tactics.

Why does God allow such things? Because the Day of the Lord is not yet here. In the meantime, we have an opportunity to testify to Jesus’ death and resurrection, and invite people to put their hope in Him. For those with eyes to see, there are signs of the Kingdom everywhere – but there is also great suffering in many places. This is nothing new or strange; in fact Jesus predicted it. The battle between darkness and light will not be resolved until Jesus returns.

In the meantime, in both easy and difficult times, we live in hope. God is calling us to be a pure bride, free of mixed motives, with our eyes fixed on our bridegroom who is surely coming. If we are in a season of peace and prosperity, we thank God for it, and seek to use it for His glory (a real challenge in a culture that constantly tempts us with immediate self-gratification in myriad guises). If we are in a season of adversity, we place our hope in Him and seek the grace to remain faithful. David advises us not to fret in such times, for “better is the little that the righteous has, than the abundance of many wicked” (Psalm 37:16). Even in adversity, like Elijah with the ravens, God’s people can expect provision as they exercise intentional faith. At all times, we place our hope in the One who is coming to make all things new.

Would I prefer to prosper while I wait? Of course – who wouldn’t? But there are seasons of plenty and seasons of adversity, and in both, God is faithful. I believe that God will bring to fruition the word I was given about being a storehouse. I want that with all my heart, because I believe it’s part of God’s destiny and purpose for me. But I also realize that the waiting is part of God’s preparation. He wants my hope, my security and my desires to be fixed on Him, not on specific outcomes that I (fool that I am) imagine I can control.

Why do we wait? Because we serve a God of hope – a God of resurrection – a God who is bigger than we are, and who will fulfil His promises in His way and in His time. We serve a God who is faithful when we have plenty, who is faithful when we suffer loss, who is faithful even when His people are being murdered for their faith. At all times He is good.

I’m glad I’m not in control.  I wouldn’t have it any other way.

 

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Faith and Finances, Reflections on Life

Another fork in the road

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Sixteen years ago this month, I embarked on a new chapter of my life. Having closed the door on eleven years as a United Church pastor followed by a five-year adventure in church planting, I enrolled in business college to learn a marketable skill other than ministry. A year later, I had emerged with a certificate in computer technology, and a contract working for a small software company whose local office was managed by Graham, a friend of mine from church.

Since then, I have made my living in the field of information technology. After a couple of years working for Graham’s company, I launched out on my own and began working as a consultant. Though I felt very green and still had a lot to learn, the Lord has blessed me in this new field of endeavour. He has provided work for me time and again, and I have had numerous confirmations that the world of business and technology – which at the time seemed like totally foreign territory to me – was a field in which he wanted me to grow and prosper.

A few days ago, I heard myself described as someone who “used to be in ministry”. The label prompted some reflection. Since “ministry” simply means “service”, am I less of a minister – less of a servant of God – because I now make my living in the world of business? I don’t think so. In fact, I am more and more convinced that God placed me in this field so that I could serve Him there.

I’ve re-examined this decision at numerous forks in the road – in fact, pretty much every time a work opportunity comes to an end, which has happened multiple times since I’ve been in this line of work. Do I bid on new IT work, or is there something else the Lord has in mind for me? So far, His consistent leading has been to keep doing what I’m doing. Last year when Marion and I were in Kansas City visiting International House of Prayer, I received a major prophetic word – from someone who knew none of the details of my life – identifying and confirming some of the purposes of God in my life that could only have been fulfilled through involvement in the worlds of business and finance.

I used to have a very religious view of money. Although I might not have said this out loud to anyone (or even acknowledged it to myself), I believed that prosperity was somehow unspiritual. I now see that money is simply a tool, which can be used to do good or evil. If I make it the aim of my life to accumulate wealth, then I have become a slave and have totally missed the point of my existence. But if I make it my aim to serve the Lord, prosperity can be a means of great blessing to many. One of the goals that Marion and I have adopted is financial freedom – not so that we can spend an easy retirement on the beach, but for the sake of increased capacity to serve the Lord both with our finances and our spiritual gifts.

This morning Marion and I had coffee with our good friends Mark and Jane, who have just decided to spend the next six years of their lives living in Indonesia, serving as long-term volunteers in a mission assignment with Mennonite Central Committee. We are excited for them. They were free to make this choice because they are not owned by their stuff. They have placed their hope in God, so they are free to do whatever He leads them to do.

Their decision is a challenge to us. Could we lay everything down, and contemplate such a radical change of direction? It seems like an important question, and yet in reality, it’s a bit of a phony question. I mean, it’s not as if I had any real control anyway. All around me I see people working hard to control their world – and for what? Control is an illusion anyway. People die unexpectedly every day, and when they do, all their plans come to an end. Since I have no real control over my future, it’s best to settle the issue of ownership at the outset. My life is not my own, and I’m glad it’s not. I can make good business decisions without being owned by my business, because I’m only in business as long as Jesus wants me there.  As long as I’m there, I’ll give it my best shot, and seek to be a faithful representative of my King where he has placed me. When he has a different assignment for me, he’ll tell me.

Another fork in the road? How exciting! Thank you, Lord, for the freedom to follow.

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Faith and Finances, Reflections on Life

It’s only money

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I was meeting with my financial advisor over tea and chocolate chip cookies one afternoon a few years ago.  Jim was also a brother in Christ and a good friend, and we used to talk not only about investing but also about life.  During one conversation we talked about how to manage finances while keeping one’s heart free of worry.  I will never forget his comment :  “After all, it’s only money”.

How many financial advisors would tell you this?  Probably not many.  Yet Jim was right, and I’ve never forgotten these simple but powerful words.  Being a good steward (or manager) is a worthy undertaking, but in the end, when all is said and done, money is only money.   It is not God, and has no ultimate power over my life.

Psalm 112 is a tribute to those who have put their hope in God.

Even in darkness light dawns for the upright,
for the gracious and compassionate and righteous man.
Good will come to him who is generous and lends freely,
who conducts his affairs with justice.
Surely he will never be shaken;
a righteous man will be remembered forever.
He will have no fear of bad news;
his heart is steadfast, trusting in the LORD.

I determined years ago that this is the kind of man I want to be – a generous man who trusts in God’s sufficiency and is therefore free enough to be gracious to others; a man whose heart is steadfast, with no fear of bad news, trusting the Lord.

I’ve had reason to remind myself of these things over the last couple of weeks.

Two days after Marion and I returned from our thirty-fifth anniversary road trip,  our son Reuben and his bride Jess borrowed our 2002 Toyota Highlander SUV for a road trip of their own.  The Highlander, although 9 years old, seemed to be in great shape and had been a reliable, trouble-free vehicle since we bought it last fall.  We were somewhat surprised to learn that the oil was quite low when we had it changed after our trip, but since we had never had problems with the engine, and had noticed no symptoms of burning oil, we agreed that it was probably OK for Reuben and Jess to go ahead with their trip.

Trouble began to surface on their second day.  The vehicle didn’t display any symptoms of burning oil, but they had to add a litre and a half of oil every day they were on the road.  Research revealed that 2001 and 2002 Highlanders had a history of developing problems with oil gelling.  At this point Reuben and Jess were in Thunder Bay, on their way to the West Coast, and they were getting concerned about crossing the Prairies.  By the time they had reached Winnipeg, we all reluctantly agreed that instead of continuing West, they would head south to Minnesota where our son Simeon lives with his wife and family.  They made it to Bloomington and the car went to the local Toyota dealership, where we learned that it would need a new engine.  Over a week later, they are still there, waiting for the repair to be completed.   So, Marion and I are dealing with a hefty financial hit, Reuben and Jess are dealing with disrupted honeymoon plans, and Simeon and Heather are dealing with much-loved guests who arrived a lot earlier than expected and have had to stay longer than anyone had counted on!

I have gone through a range of emotions and shifting concerns as I’ve processed these events.  I was briefly concerned about whether Simeon and Heather could handle an unplanned visit, but they rose to the occasion admirably.  My next concern was for Reuben and Jess, as it became clear that they would not be able to complete their planned trip to the West Coast.  At the same time, I was very grateful that they made it safely to Simeon and Heather’s place.  It’s not the Rockies – but it’s way better than being stranded!

Once we got the garage’s diagnosis and their estimate for the repair, my concern shifted to the financial impact of this situation.  As I began talking things through with Marion, we reviewed our options.  Should we have the SUV repaired in Minnesota?  Should we ask the dealer for a trade and get them home in a different vehicle?  We soon realized that having it repaired was our only option, since a US dealer cannot take a Canadian-owned vehicle in trade.  This was what we needed to do – but the price tag was high.

As I went to the Lord with my concern, He reminded me gently of Jim’s words : “It’s only money”.   It is so good to remember this.  Yes, we got an unexpected hit.  Yes, Reuben and Jess had their plans disrupted.  But in the end, these things do not need to define our lives.  How we respond – the spirit in which we choose to respond – that is what defines our lives.  I knew that I was able to respond with faith, because God is our provider and He is faithful.  So, my peace was restored.  Everything would be OK.

So we had a way forward.  The car would be fixed and Reuben and Jess would be able to continue their trip – no longer to the Coast, but at least they’d be able to get in a week and a half of camping before heading home.  Then we discovered that due to mistakes on the part of the dealership, the repair would not be completed on schedule.  The dealership had promised that they would have the SUV ready by last Friday, a week after they had first looked at the problem.  Now it appears it will not be ready until this coming Tuesday, four days later than promised.

When I first learned that there might be a further delay, I got mad. This wasn’t right!  I had been promised that  Reuben and Jess would have the car on Friday!  I left the service manager a voicemail message that was less than gracious.

Then I remembered that God loved this man.  I began asking the Lord for His heart and His perspective on this situation.  I heard back from the service manager – not once, but several times, even on his day off – who evidently felt very badly about the cascading delays which had been caused by several errors on the part of his staff, and offered to give us a discount (although the price tag was still going to be considerable).  In the end, I decided that although I might be able to justify tearing a strip out of him over these further delays, possibly leading to a further discount, God was giving me an opportunity to show him mercy so that I could speak to him about the kindness of Jesus and how He had shown mercy on me when I was far from Him.  This is what I plan to do when I talk with him one more time on Tuesday.  Compared to the eternal value of one man’s life, the cost of the engine repair is a small thing.

I have learned that as I go through life, things will happen that I cannot prevent or control, no matter how carefully I plan.  Life is full of upheavals of one sort and another that upset my carefully laid plans, sometimes in small ways and sometimes in large ones.   In fact, events that we cannot control are one of the main tools that God uses to call our hearts back to himself.  What we can control – by the grace of God – is our response to these situations.  These events have reminded me that when I anchor my hope in God’s promises, he can establish His peace in my heart, and give me the ability to respond with grace and mercy even when things seem to be going all wrong.

We forget sometimes that God has a bigger agenda than we do.  He has made us for glory, and we’re not going to get there without being changed.  If I need to take a financial hit to grow in faith, I’ll take it.  God is well able to replace the loss – after all, it’s only money.  Every time I choose the path of faith, hope and love in the midst of unexpected troubles, I am allowing God to develop my capacity to walk in His blessing and give it away, and He promises to reward me with an inheritance that, unlike money, lasts forever and can never lose its value.  Sounds like a good deal to me.

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